


this is hungry work

by avatarkadaj



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Biting, Brief Description of Past Injury, Brief Warning for Gore sort of?, Coming In Pants, First Time, Food and Sex Metaphors, Frottage, Inappropriate Kagune Usage (Tokyo Ghoul), M/M, Making Out, Rize is kind of there, Tokyo Ghoul √A Finale Spoilers, cannibalism ideation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-19 07:14:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29746908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avatarkadaj/pseuds/avatarkadaj
Summary: Kaneki and Hide make out for the first time. Kaneki wrestles with wanting to eat Hide. Hide loves him anyway.
Relationships: Kaneki Ken | Sasaki Haise/Nagachika Hideyoshi
Comments: 8
Kudos: 65





	this is hungry work

**Author's Note:**

> As for the timeline, I literally wrote this over like 3 days after binging TG s1 and Root A without bothering to fact check. As far as I'm concerned, manga canon and season 3/:re don't exist. So Hide is alive but his face and body is fine, he just has a nasty scar from getting fucked up at the end of Root A. 
> 
> As for the content, I wanted weird sex with dashes of angst and inner turmoil with Kaneki/Hide, a spicy sort of horny if you will. Enjoy!

Kaneki keeps tipping his head back, away, to the side, anywhere he can to be out of Hide's range for kisses. Hide thinks this is a game, continuing to lean and chase after him.

"Hide... Hide, don't... you can't..." Kaneki protests, pushing him away, hands on his chest.

But the way his fingers twist in the fabric, the way his black nails catch on his clothes isn't pushing him away all the way.

"Why not?" Hide asks.

His brown eyes are warm and innocent and pure. They don't understand. They don't see what Kaneki knows, what Kaneki feels. They don't see the blood in his mouth, staining his teeth, the way it makes it a home on his tongue. He can't let Hide taste that.

"Because... because I'm... I've eaten people, Hide," Kaneki says, simple, unavoidable.

People. Humans and ghouls, crouched over their bodies like a starving animal, ravenous and shoving their parts into his mouth. He can still hear the way he used to cackle, can feel how Rize enjoyed every bite. He can hear the way he used to cry afterwards.

Hide merely blinks above him. "Do you think that bothers me? If it did do you think I would be here right now, with you?"

Hide emphasizes the word here by pressing their bodies together, the fabric of his jeans catching on Kaneki's, the naked skin of their midriff sliding together. Kaneki arches, following the sensation. It's so soft. It's so kind and gentle to him.

He pretends his stomach doesn't growl.

Hide leaves a trail of kisses up his throat, along his jaw. It's both full of desire -- open mouth, a hint of teeth -- and tenderness -- the pace is slow, pressed into his skin as sweet as honey.

"I knew - well, not the whole time, but most of it," Hide continues against the shell of his ear, intertwining their fingers. "I knew you had changed, that you were a ghoul. And I still wanted you. I missed you. I was sad that I couldn't have you."

Kaneki gasps softly, his breath caught in his throat between the words and the way Hide nibbles his earlobe, licks a stripe up his neck. He grips the hand he's holding, trying to be careful- Hide is just human, after all. Kaneki could break him so, so easily.

"Honestly, I was a little jealous. Since I thought you were with Touka-chan," Hide admits, huffing out a laugh.

Kaneki loves the way his laugh sounds: genuine, pure in his ear.

" _Anno,_ no we aren't, we weren't--" Kaneki starts to protest.

Hide laughs again, and even without looking Kaneki knows his eyes are crinkled at the corner from it.

"I know that now, but you were so distant. I didn't know," Hide explains.

He suddenly drops his head to the crook of Kaneki's shoulder, his shaggy hair tickling the side of his neck. "I wanted you to come back. To come home to me. I still dreamt about you, about this, even after I knew. You were still my Kaneki, no matter what."

Kaneki closes his eyes to process, interrupted in his thoughts by the way Hide attempts to leave a hickey on his collarbone. His regeneration factor is too strong for it, but Hide tries nonetheless. His eyes prick at the sensation; its good, it's so good but he knows he can't do it in return no matter how much he wants to. It's too dangerous, walking on the razor's edge to even think about it.

He kneads Hide's shoulder with his free hand, as if to chase off the hunger. Kaneki can't tempt himself - he likes to think he wouldn't hurt Hide, likes to think he has the restraint. But Hide smells so good - the memory of his blood dripping on the floor of Anteiku, the overwhelming scent, the desire to _consume,_ to lick every drop of the tile and put his hands inside the wound and --

Kaneki doesn't want to eat Hide. Hide is his friend. Hide is not food. Kaneki knows this.

But Kaneki also thought once he wouldn't eat a ghoul, either. Kaneki knows he is capable of evil, that he is barely holding on some days.

The spiral in his head almost ruins the mood, were it not for feeling Hide's warm breath on his face, against his mouth.

"So come on, let me kiss you."

Kaneki moves his hand into Hide's hair, strokes against his scalp. He's so soft. He plays with the strands as Hide cups his face. He leans into it, his gray eyes pensive and considering. Hide's eyes watch him, half-lidded, happy.

Kaneki nods, eyelids fluttering closed.

Hide presses their lips together, soft, slow. Hide lets Kaneki set the pace, lets him pull away and come back at his leisure, lets him part his lips when he's ready.

Hide tastes good. Almost as good as he smells. Kaneki slides his tongue into his mouth, rewarded with a low noise when he does.

"You've had to have been kissing someone else, Kaneki," Hide teases when they part, sounding giddy and breathless. "That was too good."

Kaneki smiles and snorts good-naturedly, looking up at Hide through his lashes.

"And you practically taste like coffee."

"Like the coffee you make? I'm sorry then."

Hide unlaces their fingers so he could push himself up with both hands, mock offended.

"Oh come on. I'm getting better at it!"

Kaneki laughs, pulls him in for another kiss. He's just happy he tastes like bad coffee instead of blood and skin and entrails. He doesn't get how Hide could want to kiss him, to push his tongue into his mouth and _like_ it, but he certainly enjoys the way Hide tastes. It makes him sigh and roll his hips up, gripping his shoulders to pull him down.

He wants more, he wants to be closer, he wants to be inside his skin, inside his ribcage. He wants and wants and wants in a way he didn't know he wanted, like a floodgate pouring out of him.

"Kaneki," Hide breathes against his lips, a low sound- a moan escaping.

Hide wants, too, Kaneki could feel it as real as his own. He grinds his hips down, a sensual roll of his body. Kaneki digs his nails into his shoulders, shoving his hands under his shirt. Even with the constraints of his jeans it still feels good, feels electric. He rocks up, trying to make a rhythm between their hips and their kisses.

This must be what heaven feels like. Maybe there is an afterlife, and in it he's with Hide and they're happy and they're like this forever.

Hide shifts above him, sitting up in a bit of a straddle with his weight hovering above Kaneki. Hide's body would weigh practically nothing to Kaneki, he's carried and withstood much more than the weight of a fit nineteen year old human, but he appreciates the gesture. Hide slides his shirt off and tosses it carelessly aside before going for Kaneki's. Kaneki lets him take it off, assists as needed, more preoccupied with the way the dying light catches on the jagged scar on Hide's abdomen.

The memories flash back again- dripping blood on the tile, the wound gaping enough that Kaneki could have easily pushed his fingers inside and yet Hide had the audacity to joke and try to comfort him until he couldn't stand anymore, crying on Hide's face - as he presses his palm against it. He would have healed him if he could have, traded his life for Hide's in a heartbeat. Shame rips inside him, burns hot enough to make him clench his jaw. If he hadn't been in the way, if he hadn't been reckless, if he hadn't been helpless --

Hide's hand covered his own. "Hey, don't worry about that. I'm fine, man. It's in the past."

That's just like Hide. To make it that simple, that easy.

Hide relaxes again, settling down against Kaneki's body. He hovers just so, bracing his weight on his forearms. He reaches up and runs a hand through Kaneki's hair tenderly, scrunching and soothing the white strands.

"Besides, if you wanna compare, you've had it way worse. Especially with..." Hide gently tugs the hair in his hand for emphasis, what the white means.

 _With Jason_ , is what he doesn't say. But Hide doesn't understand. It's not that Hide was traumatized and has recovered, and Kaneki didn't. That's a different issue. Hide doesn't understand that the problem is that Hide was traumatized because of him, that it was his fault, that he couldn't protect the person he loved the most.

Sensing the shift in aura, Hide searches over Kaneki's face, brown eyes warm and understanding.

"We can stop, y’know, if you want."

Kaneki wraps both arms around him, grabbing his shoulders. Hide is so soft and warm under his hands. He doesn't want him to go.

"No, please... don't. I still want to."

Hide smirks a little, and Kaneki wants to hit him for it but still he dissolves under another searing kiss. Kisses are so good. Part of him regrets waiting, resisting but the other part is waiting for Hide to lean back and spit out blood, looking tainted, looking stained. Kaneki tries not to think about it, and instead thinks about Hide's hands, with their tiny human blemishes feel on his waist, about his tongue in his mouth and the way it tastes.

Kaneki makes a soft sigh of a noise between kisses, sliding a hand into Hide's hair again. He wants more, wants more than just soft. It feels good - it feels sweet, it feels like something he can't name. But his body is used to violence, used to pressure and pain and even if there are no scars to show for it, oh, does his body remember. He longs for aggression, for passion.

Hide noises, moans against him, hands splayed across Kaneki's waist when Kaneki tugs. Its almost a surprised moan, like he's remembering in that very moment the strength in Kaneki's damaged pale hands, and how much restraint he's displaying. "O-oh... what is it, Kaneki? Too much?"

Kaneki shakes his head. "Not enough. I need..."

The sentence fades out like the evening sunlight sifting through the blinds, sunset turning to night. Kaneki doesn't know what he wants, gets lost in the way the dusk turns Hide's golden hair a fiery copper, lights up his eyes like the fire at Anteiku. Hide is so beautiful. He wants so much he doesn't have the words.

"Need what?" Hide asks.

Hide's hands stroke at his sides almost absently while he waits. That feels... nice. That feels really nice. It's a very light pressure, in comparison to what he's used to. Kaneki feels himself float off, eyes fluttering closed, lulled, content, the heat in his core like a dull simmer, steady to boiling.

"Oh, like this?"

Hide isn't hovering over him anymore, his voice sounding closer to his ear. He nods, arching his back to press his body into Hide's hands. He trusts Hide's hands.

"Shit, Kaneki," Hide swears against his throat, kissing there again.

He lowers his hands to Kaneki's hips, letting one hand linger over his stomach. Kaneki feels a different stir, like Rize inside him when he does that. He can see her trying to reach out, wanting to consume him. Kaneki turns his grip into claws against Hide's shoulder, resisting, pushing her away. Hide hisses in his ear, and his hands move to grasp his hips more firmly.

Then Hide rubs circles into his hips with his thumbs doing below his waistband, using the hold as leverage to grind his hips down. Arousal shoots through him sharper than hunger pangs, a choked noise punched out of him. Kaneki digs his blunt nails in hard, bucking up instinctively, gasping quietly.

Hide bites in response to the nails, a somehow remarkably gentle thing. Perhaps because he isn't biting to kill or eat but out of pleasure, of emotion. Kaneki zeroes on it, tensing, eyes wide. Where he expects pain, he only feels... lust. It feels _good._

He likes it. A sort of shuddering sigh leaves him with the realization.

"Oh - man - is that okay?" Hide asks, leaning back.

Kaneki nods eagerly, tipping his head to the side to offer more skin. "Y-yes. That was - that was good."

Anything to get Hide to come back and keep going.

He rolls his hips up, drags his nails down his back with carefully applied strength. It would be so easy to tear his skin open if he wasn't careful. Hide shudders at the sensation, the enthusiasm, returns the grind of his hips. Kaneki whines, gasps as Hide undoes their jeans, pulls down their fly so they have one less layer between them.

"Ah... ah... that better?" Hide pants against his collarbone, close enough that Kaneki can feel the ghost of his canines.

Kaneki nods, at a loss for words. He noises with every roll of their hips, kneading at Hide's shoulders, his back, anywhere he can get his hands on. The burning arousal inside him breaches past boiling, like a whistling kettle overflowing. Hide bites again, and again, fascinated by the way it makes Kaneki whine, the way he can feel him pulse against his own bulge. He wonders what else he can do to make it even better. He keeps one hand on his hip and the other circles under Kaneki's arched back.

It's not what he expects, the sensation makes him freeze. He expects Hide to slide his hand into his pants, grab his ass and make him move to the rhythm that he wants to set, show him how it's done. That seems like Hide; taking the lead, being the bold one, knowing what to do in a situation like this.

Kaneki gasps, making a low noise in his throat he didn't know he could make as Hide traces circles on his lower back just above the base of his spine. It's the tender patch where his kagune appears from, the dormant sacs just below the skin. It's more sensitive than he thought it would be as Hide rubs gently with the pads of his fingers.

"Ah... ah... H-hide... hah..."

Hide kisses his exposed throat, groaning openly. "Oh, is that it? Do you like that Kaneki?"

Kaneki nods, unable to make words at all. The pressure of it makes him twitch with pleasure and not just the arousal straining against his underwear either. It's so soft, the slow circles contrasting with the way Hide ruts into him from above. He squirms, drags his nails harder and hooks one of his legs around Hide's hips. He needs more - he needs closer- he wants all of it - he wants to feel him --

"Fuck - Kaneki - I didn't know if it would - God this is so good," Hide manages against the crook of his shoulder, grasping at the pillow by Kaneki's head for leverage.

Kaneki can feel how much Hide likes this- from his low groans in his ear that melt into pants, before he leans in for a kiss, to the way his hips rock, pace stuttering as a damp patch on his underwear matches Kaneki's, to the way his gentle circling naturally crescendos into rough rubs and into clawed nails digging in. But even more he can smell it - the sweat on his skin, the pheromones and the desperation. Kaneki can taste it in their kisses - the desire on his tongue, the urge to consume and taste and take. And Kaneki wants to bite - wants to bite -- shoves his tongue inside -- feels Hide bite his lower lip --

Kaneki tries to warn him, tries to pull away and keens loudly. Fuck, he's going to -

Kaneki would have been embarrassed about coming in his pants, about coming first -- Hide must have more experience and last longer than this -- but he doesn't really have the time. The more mortifying act of his kagune pushing out and wrapping around Hide's legs, his waist, the upper two poised to strike, takes his attention first. Then the searing pain as he realizes he's bitten into his own wrist, teeth sunk in deep to draw blood.

He looks at Hide with wide, teary eyes, afraid. He expects fear and disgust - how must Kaneki look right now, kagune out and threatening, his kakugan out of control, about to tear his own skin off because he wanted to _bite_ Hide, he wanted to _bite Hide so bad_ \--

But... there isn't any of that.

Hide looks at him with awe, with wonder, like the way you watch a storm or the ocean at night, waves crashing into the shore. Kaneki belatedly releases his wrist and Hide turns it so he can watch it heal.

"Hide, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to --"

Kaneki tries to move, to unwrap him from his kagune but he can't, it won't budge. He still wants.

Hide just locks their fingers together. "Don't worry about it. It doesn't bother me. It's not like I don't know you're a ghoul, Kaneki. I like this too."

He runs the hand that was stimulating the skin, now resting at the base of his kagune, along the fleshy edge. Kaneki recoils, uncomfortable with the new sensation - no one has ever touched his kagune without violence, without being a threat. Hide pauses, fingers splayed across one of the tentacle-like appendages, watching his face for a sign.

Kaneki breathes heavily for a moment, trying to relax. He wants Hide to touch him, all of him, even these parts too. Hide said he liked it. The upper two slowly lower, slide down Hide's shoulders, really hold him. He knows they can be used to hold - he's seen others do it, without the intent of consumption. But it feels like he's burning - having prey this close in his grasp - and he's compliant, Hide is just letting him do this.

He thinks about what Nishiki said, about trust and betrayal. He doesn't want to betray Hide. He loves him. Hide is his friend. Not food.

Feeling the tension leave the kagune, Hide continues to touch it, run his hands along the velvety surface. Softer than he expected it to be when it wasn't being cracked like a whip. Much like leather in that way. He curls his fingers and does gentle scratching motions before starting to stroke up one of them.

Kaneki arches his back, sighing softly. It feels unexpectedly nice, reigniting the pang of hunger, of arousal in him. He makes a subtle noise of surprise when he feels Hide is still aroused, hears his affected breathing. Hide still wants him, still likes him, like this. Hide likes _all_ of him.

"Yo, Kaneki, do you think you could...?"

Kaneki feels his face burn as Hide leaves the sentence hanging. He moves to release him from the kagune's grip, use his hand to bring him to completion.

"No, uh, not like that," Hide stops him, admits with a deep blush.

"Hide!" Kaneki protests, more out of surprise than anything else.

"I'm sorry I'm just curious. And I liked it when your hands were scratching at me so I just thought y'know..."

Kaneki huffs out a laugh. He puts his hands back on his shoulders, replacing the kagune as they shift lower as Hide keeps talking.

"And I just want to show you how much I trust you okay?"

Kaneki hesitates. Hide trusts him. It's a lot of weight to consider - the temptation is intense. He starts up with the kneading again, as one tendril creeps down to Hide's bulge. Hide gasps as the tip rubs against him, wraps around the length. The noises and sighs of pleasure let him know what feels good, what pressure is right. A quiet moan makes its way out of him as he feels Hide rock against the kagune, chasing the pleasure, seeking more. He didn't expect it to feel _good_ like that.

"Ahh, ah fuck Kaneki..." Hide groans against his neck, moving his hand from the kagune under him to the one on his cock, like pressing him closer.

Kaneki drags his nails down, rough. "Hn... Hide... that feels..."

He rolls his hips up, where Hide can feel his renewed arousal against the back of his hand. The kagune moves, shifts to accommodate both of them, bringing them together. Trembling, Hide braces himself up on his hand instead, letting Kaneki do the work. They work together in a new rhythm, rutting, grinding against each other.

Hide's hips start to stutter, get erratic, his arousal pulsing against the kagune.

"Ka... Kaneki, I think I- I'm close, I'm - ah... gonna..."

Kaneki bucks, hard, turns his face into the crook of his elbow. Hide sounds so good, so delicious like that. Almost begging for release, a near whine to his voice. His breathing is hard, like he's run a marathon- like he's been chased for a while. And the way he smells - all desperate, the scent of sweat and pre clinging to him -- Kaneki feels his abdomen tighten and he doesn't know if it's hunger or arousal. He doesn't want to hurt him, doesn't want to bite, despite how much Rize hungers for it inside him, her kagune tightening around Hide's legs.

"Kaneki!" Hide cries his name into his neck as he finishes, shuddering against him.

Hide pants softly against his skin, coming down from the high, before pressing appreciative kisses there. Kaneki breathes heavily still, feeling like he's on the edge as he retracts his kagune.

"That was - that was really good... Not what I expected from my first but I liked it," Hide mumbles between kisses.

Kaneki blinks in surprise - _first?_ \- but the feeling dissolves into another round of pleasure when Hide sucks a would-be hickey into his neck, under his jaw.

"Kaneki, you're drooling --"

In more ways than one and both are embarrassing. He looks away, mortified.

"Please, if you want to - you can bite. Just a bit. It must have been hard, doing that for me..."

Kaneki snaps his attention to Hide, who's looking down at him so earnestly. He means it. That's what Hide's love is. Selfless. Still, Kaneki shakes his head.

"No, I'm fine, I--"

Hide snakes a hand between them, groping Kaneki's cock through his boxers. Kaneki whimpers with shame about the wet patch he knows Hide can feel.

"But you're still hungry, right? You still want more? It's okay -- I want to satisfy you."

Kaneki doesn't know what to say, dissolving into a soft gasp as Hide touches him. Ensnaring a hand in his hair, he pulls him in for a kiss. It alternates between rough and tender, searing and gentle as Kaneki arches and rocks under Hide's touch. He pulls away, tossing his head back when he feels close again.

The urge bubbles up again, the need. He clings to him, nails carving lines into Hide's back, driven by Hide's whispered encouragement. Panting into Hide's shoulder, he bucks up into his hand, seeking completion.

The second orgasm hits him almost as hard as the first, pressing Hide close to him in every way he can. He muffles a cry with the bite he was given permission for, sinking his teeth into Hide's shoulder. Hide noises with pain despite his best efforts not to, and Kaneki hates that he likes that too.

Kaneki lets go, instinctively lapping up the blood. He watches it, seeing the blood well in the twin crescent moon shapes of a bite before swiping his tongue over it. His head feels fuzzy, tired, like after a holiday meal. He thought the want would be worse, like when they were kissing - like he wouldn't be able to resist- but the hunger feels dulled, satisfied. He drops his head to the pillow, half-lidded eyes on the bite.

Hide leans back, touching the wound with one hand experimentally. "Ah, man... I thought it would be worse than that."

Kaneki chuckles a little, feeling spent. "I've said it before. Hide is friend, not food."

"Just a friend? And here I was gonna tell you I love you," Hide says, running a hand through his hair, smiling at Kaneki to show he was kidding.

Kaneki smiles up at him. "If you had said it, I would say it back."

Hide smiles more, beaming like the sun. And it makes Kaneki think, it doesn't matter if there's an afterlife for ghouls or humans or one-eyes, because he has this life, here.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is taken from Take Me to Church by Hozier. I searched for like four hours for the right food and sex metaphor. I love the concept of "everything is sex except sex" and food & sex relations in general and I think Tokyo Ghoul handled it in an interesting way with Shuu and Rize.


End file.
